A great day

Yesterday I had an off day where I was really scared of going anywhere 😦 the panic monster really didn’t want me doing anything, but I came through and got to March and Downham Market.

Today we planned on going to Denver windmill that’s just near Downham market, and with the sun shining, I manged to get there.

I climbed up the ladder’s to nearly the last floor of the windmill. The other half lost his keys though when we got back to the car, I thought omg! how am I going to get home!! I managed to not panic remarkably and thought he was laid down on grass taking a photo and sure enough that’s where his keys where, if they hadn’t have been there then I would have fallen apart lol.

Next we headed into Downham town had a milkshake, and I agreed to go see a church in Bexwell.

That wasn’t as far as I thought it might have been, and was a great little church.

Afterwards we headed to Stow Bardolph as there is a farm here I would like to visit, even though it’s properly a tourist trap.

I panicked as we ended up on a busy main road, then I recognized a pub there, which is mad since I was like 15-16 yrs old when I went to this pub.

I stayed calm anyway, and before heading home tried the Kings Lynn roundabout again, and I think the next stage is to go a bit further across the river.

Happy birthday to me

So last year for my birthday treat, Mista took me to the farm in Friday Bridge, which is just up the road from me, and I remember being very bloody nervous. Seems so silly now.

Yesterday we took K to the butterfly park in Long Sutton, the park itself was not as good as I thought it might be, but I still enjoyed it, the animals and the fact that I had made it 🙂

Also as an added treat we found out my brother was 10 minutes up the road, so we met him for a cup of Tea.

I made it

I got to Downham Market the other day with very little hassle from the Panic Monster.

Had a good day, and was very comfy walking around the town, will definitely go again and also maybe take K with us.

A place that was waiting in the horizon for a very long time, was not even scary once there


Thought I would make a note on the improvement’s I have noticed in myself since starting this blog.

I’m more comfy being on my own, I hated having to sit on my own and in the past would not have done it, I would have gone and sat round someones. But now I can stay at home, wait for Mista to return in the evenings, or stay at my dad’s on my own.

Ok with K could be a different story, I’m alright round my dad’s way with her, and I had been working on being at home with just K, which was going well,but I normally start to feel Un-comfy after about an hour. This I will have to work on.

The other day taking one of my daughter’s to the dentist, I was very relaxed in the waiting room, normally I would be anxious, I’m having to wait for god know’s how long, trapped in a room, everyone’s quiet, I’m fidgety, but no none of that, I was even reading a book, couldn’t believe how calm I was inside.

Even going to Wisbech used to feel scary with Mista, I’m sure he will never forget the 1st time I marched him through town lol

Tescos….Thats another one, didn’t like the place, very big and bright, but now I don’t think about it, I go inside as normal as Larry.

I would say I have improved with car travelling, I’m more comfy with my surrounding area now, and can certainly travel a lot further that I used to be able too. Some day’s I get scared, cause some days that panic still talks to me, I find I can mostly go back to the place and go further if I have had an episode that has scared me and I have asked to go home.

Was very pleased I got to the butterfly park,or at least saw the place,  looking forward to visiting there,  also  got to walk round the town of Long Sutton the other day.

And the cinema, went there the other day, and some nerves where present, but I was not as anxious as the 1st two times I went.

Thanks for Mista for holding my hand, and putting up with the tantrum’s, here’s to many more adventures…..